God’s Surprising Detour: Embracing Cross-Cultural Community
by Jennifer Stuhan
He texted me a United Arab Emirates flag emoji late in the afternoon in January 2017. I was floored. My phone was plugged in by my bedside table as I sat on the side of the bed. Excitement, worry, angst, anticipation, and fear all hit me like a ton of bricks. I started to weep. I pulled myself together enough to call him. “Are you for real?” I was in utter shock.
Stuhans take Abu Dhabi (2017). Image courtesy of Jennifer Stuhan.
I was an Air Force wife for nine years, but I had only moved once from my hometown of thirty-five years. And our move was only 150 miles away from my hometown. And we had moved Mama and Daddy with us. So basically, I had never left the comforts of home.
Home was in North Texas. We were part of a close-knit, ultra-conservative church. Even though I attended a high school where white kids were the minority, I had never been exposed to true international diversity. I had “red, brown, yellow, black, & white” friends, but never had friends who were BORN in a different country. All were American, born, and raised. Further, I could only count a few people I knew that weren’t born in America. So, you can imagine my mixed emotions when my husband confirmed with me that we received orders to move to the Middle East.
Over the next few weeks, Google and YouTube became my best friend. From afar, I learned all about the Burj Khalifa, the Grand Mosque, & Lulu Hypermarket. I studied Google images of men in kandoras and women in abayas. After all, people dressed like this were “terrorists.” I had learned my presuppositions and judgments from Fox News & MSNBC. “These people” had flown airplanes into the World Trade Center. Oh, how my ignorant, preconceived thinking would change over the next two years. I trusted in Joshua 1:9,
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.
Sheikh Zayed Grand Mosque (2017). Image courtesy of Jennifer Stuhan.
Jack pointing to the Burj Khalifa before the Hillsong concert (2017). Image courtesy of Jennifer Stuhan.
Fast forward to late in the evening on May 9, 2017. My all-American children (my youngest has nearly white curly hair with the bluest eyes) landed in the United Arab Emirates. Processing through customs, we were literally surrounded by Arabs in kandoras and abayas inspecting our passports and visas. My stress levels were through the roof. I noticed our daughter and her pillowcase embroidered with “Shine for Jesus” accidentally on display. I just *knew* it would be confiscated—but never was. We walked out of the Abu Dhabi International Airport to a blanket of “warm moist” laid over us. The weather was in the high 90s, and humidity was in the upper 40%.
Mary Helen’s pillow on display through the airport (2017). Image courtesy of Jennifer Stuhan.
My husband’s colleagues met us to transport us to our temporary living arrangements. Our ride from the airport to downtown Abu Dhabi was late at night, so we didn’t “see” much. However, we passed the Grand Mosque that I had seen on Google. It was lit-up a pale lavender and appeared to float in midair. We arrived at our apartment after nearly twenty hours of travel. That memory is hazy. We were jetlagged, so we didn’t waste any time crawling in bed to get some much-needed rest.
At around 5:30 am, I was awoken by Fajr, the first morning call to prayer. I sat straight up in the bed. I nudged my husband, “Eric, what is that?” When he confirmed, in disbelief, I questioned, “THEY DO THAT HERE?!” I had heard calls to prayer in movies and television shows but never imagined that I’d hear THAT, five times a day, every day for the next twenty-four months. After the immediate shock, I rushed to our bedroom balcony to see what was going on. I could see men walking to the mosque across the alley from our building. After a few minutes, I could see them bowing to pray, up and down, up and down. Y’all. I can’t even describe in words the fear, wonder, and awe over what I was watching. I just kept asking Eric, “WHERE have we moved??”
Camel Souq (2017). Image courtesy of Jennifer Stuhan.
Over the next two years, the Lord would stretch my heart, judgments, and obedience with a spiritual rolling pin. We joined a local church that is truly international. A real glimpse of what Glory will be. Nearly ALL nations worship together. Revelation 7:9 says,
After this I looked, and behold, a great multitude that no one could number, from every nation, from all tribes and peoples, and languages, standing before the throne and before the Lamb…
Labanese food (2017). Image courtesy of Jennifer Stuhan.
During our time in the Middle East, I learned about Indian bangle ceremony for a new, expectant mother. I learned about Australians celebrating Christmas in their summer season. I ate all the international foods—jollof rice, biriyani, dumplings, fattoush, shawarma, & harees. I learned a tiny bit or shway shway of Arabic, including the greeting “salaam alaykum” & the all-important, “Inshallah.” Above all, I heard the personal faith testimonies of people from all over the earth. I learned that Christianity has NOTHING to do with American-ism but all about God’s desire for “all the earth” to come and worship Him in their own tongue and tribe.
An Emirati colleague of my husband’s became a very close friend to our family. He and his Moldovan fiancé spent many dinners with us. We celebrated Iftars and birthdays, Thanksgiving, Christmas, & Mother’s Day with them. This man was a God-send to all of us. He allowed me to ask my ignorant American questions—
Why do Arab women cover?
Why do some wear the shayla and others only wear the niqab?
Why do Arabs eat on the floor?
Our dear friends (2017). Image courtesy of Jennifer Stuhan.
–and so on. My heart’s walls were breaking down, and a love was budding for these people. Once thought of as a foreign enemy, I was now falling in love with the Arab culture. Paul says in Luke talks in chapter 10 that God shows no favoritism, and in chapter 17 how God desires people from every nation to seek Him, and find their way toward Him. I believe God blessed us with this experience so we can one day tell these people, at least one or two, hear about Jesus. We shall see…
John William learning how to weave palm fronds (2017). Image courtesy of Jennifer Stuhan.
Toward the end of our assignment in Abu Dhabi, I was ready to move back stateside. Our entire family was excited and looking forward to the “what’s next?” for our family. I was ready for all the material things like Target, Walmart, Hobby Lobby, and, most importantly—CHICK-FIL-A! I didn’t know then how much I’d miss Abu Dhabi, our dear friends who had become family, and the oh-so-safe way of life offered in the United Arab Emirates. However, we had no idea that God would move us to one of the largest refugee resettlement areas in the United States.
Our family joined a church that has a deep connection with the resettlement program here in Virginia. Our first week attending this church, we heard of a “100 Cups of Tea” initiative, where our church focused on having one hundred connections with newly replaced refugees, mostly from Afghanistan and Iran. On my first “tea date,” I stayed over two hours in this Afghan home, sitting on the floor, talking about their hardships in Afghanistan and then to Iran, and then this family’s migration to the US. I showed pictures from my phone of my children to their daughter and some of our experiences in Abu Dhabi. Mom and I exchanged phone numbers for what will hopefully become a beautiful friendship.
Mary Helen painted a portrait for a Sheikh in the royal family (2017). Image courtesy of Jennifer Stuhan.
In most cases, the Persian Muslims are different from Arab Muslims. However, to this ol girl’s heart, I didn’t care about those differences. I found comfort meeting these covered women and seeing them light up when I speak Arabic and the little Farsi I know. My heart oddly feels at home when grabbing an Afghan woman by the arms and sharing a cheek kiss, three times.
Who would have ever thought that God’s plan for my life included living in the Middle East?! However, now, I can’t imagine NOT living there, and in some parts of my heart, I’d be okay if God called us back over there to live again. After all, Roman 8:28 says,
...for those who love God all things to work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
Whatever may come my way, I am excited to see how God will use our time of living in Abu Dhabi, and how he will continue using His rolling pin to stretch my heart.
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